


Rise From The Ash

by billie33gd



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Thor (Movies)
Genre: M/M, More characters to come
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-15
Updated: 2016-08-07
Packaged: 2018-03-30 15:54:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3942664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/billie33gd/pseuds/billie33gd
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Redemption is not just an action: It is a long and restless path. One that Loki knows is a lost cause. Yet, when you have someone rooting for you, there can be a light, however dim, at the end of the tunnel.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

It took all but the Avengers a second to have their weapons ready when Thor and Loki landed on the outside of Stark Tower.

“What are you doing here, with _him_?” Clint snarled, pointing to the tall, thin, shaking god standing behind his brother.

“I have come to ask a favor of you Avengers.” Thor spoke firmly, gripping his arm. He looked scared when Thor touched him. “And Director Fury has agreed to meet us.”

“Ah, no. He’s not allowed here.” Tony landed in front of both of them, his visor flipping up.

“I told you this was a bad idea Thor.” Loki whispered, backing up. His brother held firm, keeping the trickster from moving any further. He shook against Thor’s hand, more than he should have.

“As my friends, I please ask for you to hear me out.”

Reluctantly, Tony agreed, having the others walk behind the two gods.

This was going to be a long night.

~****~

“Loki has had his punishment.” Thor’s eyes suddenly turned cold and unyielding.

“I don’t think there is enough punishment for that little shit.” Clint snarled. “It has been two years, and I still haven’t been able to get the nightmares out of my head.”

“I’m inclined to agree with the hawk.” Bruce added. Both men sent nasty glares toward the god.

“Please continue, Thor.” Steve gestured. None were happy about the other one being there, but they didn’t have much of a choice. Thor wanted to talk, and they would let him.

“As I said, Loki has suffered his punishment, and more. But there is one thing. He must repay his debt,”

“Ha, no.” Clint snapped, shaking his head. “We owe him nothing. So he should be shoved back into the dungeon like all super-villains, and left to die.”

“If his debt is not repaid, or attempted, Loki will be sent back to Asgard for execution.” Thor finally settled, eyes betraying his feeling toward Odin’s final decision.

No one spoke for a moment, but then Clint, finally spoke.

“And that is our problem, how?”

Loki sat in beside his brother, trying not to let his fear show. That was it. He and Thor would return to Asgard, and within a week, Loki would be executed publicly.

The trickster knew he deserved it.

“Wait, I thought your kind didn’t do execution?” Tony spoke up, and Loki let a trembling breath out. Something felt completely off about the person sitting there, compared to the one that left two years ago. He slightly cowered away from Thor, the genius noted, turning his attention back.

“Father was not going to suggest it, but the high council thought otherwise.” Thor spoke sadly.

“Rid the world of a monster, and it shall be better.” Loki whispered.

“Shut up, you asshole.” Clint shouted. “I think you really deserve this. For what you’ve done, what you’ve caused!!! Why should we allow you to prove anything?”

“I’m inclined to agree with Agent Barton.” The director finally spoke after examining the exchange. “But if we allow him back, how are we to know he won’t try to make us ‘a world free of freedom’ again?”

“Loki has been through the mind healers, and wears an invisible magic trace upon his wrists. His magic has been subdued to the barest of anything. Besides what is needed to keep his body functioning. Cuts and others will heal like our kind. What he needs to keep others, and himself alive. He is mortal with the adeptness to heal others faster than they can on their own.”

“Thor, would you please allow me to speak to the team alone?” Fury asked. The thunder god nodded, taking his brother with him. Once the doors closed, he stood at the end of the table. “It’s your call.”

“No.” Clint crossed his arms over his chest.

“Same.” Tony added.

“I don’t want anyone’s blood on our hands.” Steve looked to the two, shaking his head. “Even if Loki’s done what he has, it’s still not fair to let him be executed.”

“That’s a good point Steve.” Bruce sighed. “I agree. I don’t want any death on my hands. God knows I’ve had enough.”

“What about the blood on his hands?” Tony asked incredulously.

“We all have blood on our hands Stark.” Natasha spoke up quietly from her seat. “All I can say is that, everyone deserves a second chance. I was given one.”

Her eyes flashed briefly to Clint, before looking to Fury.

“I want him for the first week.” The director followed all their glances.

“Take him for two. I don’t want him in my tower.” Tony folded his arms. “JARVIS, set up video and audio feed outside.”

_Of course sir._ The AI responded, bringing up the video. Thor sat beside Loki, who looked worn, thin, and overly pale.

“ _I would see my death here, brother.” The younger god sighed. “For goodness knows I deserve it.”_

“ _Loki, come now. I found redemption here with Lady Jane and her friends. I believe you can find something too.”_

“ _When will you understand that your friends only pretended because they feared you? Brother, I do not wish to be friends with your friends. I wish to be dead, just like the universe promised.”_

“Universe?” Bruce asked first, sliding his glasses up.

“ _You were floating in a void. Of course you wish for death.” Thor placed a hand on his trembling shoulder, but the younger pulled away._

“ _The sooner you go back in, the sooner my fate will be in toll. Please,”_

“ _Aye brother.” Thor stood._

“Well this is either all a trick, or whatever they did helped him.” Bruce spoke up again. “What happens if SHIELD has him for two weeks? Because to be honest, I don’t like the sound of that.”

“Just some questioning, and to make sure he can’t harm anyone.” Fury shrugged.

“My friends, have you come to a decision?” Thor pushed the doors open. Loki did not follow.

“If we do this, what do we get out of it Thor? I’m all for second chances, but that is Loki. I don’t know if he can have a second chance.” The doctor spoke calmly, surprised the younger had not followed.

“You get to see a lost boy become more than I ever gave the chance too.” Thor replied quietly. “Loki was not himself two years ago. He still is not, but he sometimes has the light in his eyes from when we were much younger. I fear he expects death too much now.”

“Well it is the easy way out.” Tony shrugged. “He’ll look for the easy way out. Make us feel sorry for him. I’m sorry, but I can’t ever trust him Thor. What about Phil, huh?”

“I was informed by the director that Son of Coul is doing well in Portland with his chellist maiden.” Thor looked toward Fury, who’s eye widened.

“But he still intended to kill him-”

“Aye, we were taught as children that if a warrior dies in battle, they would be sent to Valhalla. Loki did not understand your concept of battle, and I know he is regretful of his actions.”

“Yea, I’ll call it when I see it.” Clint stood and stormed out of the room.

“Director, I will allow Loki to be with your SHIELD for the two weeks. It could help prepare the other Avengers.”

“Where is he supposed to sleep? I don’t want him in my tower.” Tony stood shaking his head.

“If he is to repay his debt, then he must be with you in doing so. He is a strategist, and could help-”

“He can stay on my floor.” Bruce offered. “I’m not saying I’ll speak with him, or trust him, but I can’t die. Easier, and if he attempts, the other guy can toss him like a rag doll.”

“Fine!” Tony threw his hands up. “I want to study his magic when he’s back from SHIELD. And I want to know where he is at every hour of every day. Understand that?”

“That can be arranged.” Fury smirked. Tony walked out, followed by the other two. Steve, Natasha and Bruce remained, thinking about their decision.

“Can, can we trust SHIELD with a ‘reformed’ villain?” Steve asked, looking to the widow.

“No.” She rose, and left the two behind.

Steve and Bruce glanced at the doorway she walked through. Life was going to be, different now. So different.

~****~

“Here’s your home for the next two weeks, princess.” The guard shoved Loki into a small room, without even a bed. It had come, and Thor would be oblivious. “Maybe even longer.”

Loki did not respond. He felt the camera in the corner follow his every move, so he stayed still. Sitting in a corner and hugging his knees.

_Death, come swiftly, I beg of you._ The god sent through his head, rocking back and forth slowly.  _For torture at the hand of those I am supposed to help shall be my undoing._

The first day, (he was not sure if it was a day, or only an hour) passed by with no company. No food, or water, or sustenance. The god remained in his corner, whispering wishes of death upon himself.

The second day, two men resembling Thor in mass, barged in. They grabbed Loki forcefully, and dragged him down many hallways. He didn’t bother to count how many doors, or nasty looks he got. They were deserved.

When he was tossed into a room, other hands grabbed him, and threw him onto a table. Loki didn’t struggle, instead, he let them do what they wanted. Straps were tightened across his chest, feet, legs, and wrists.

He could attempt to break them, and decided against it.

Needles were shoved into his skin, new scars were made, and something was carved into his arm. He knew the word as the man dragged the knife along his skin.

Hours or days later, he could no longer tell, another entered the room. This time with an IV bag and needle.

The moment the contents of the bag began flowing under his skin, the screams couldn’t be prevented. His entire body was on fire, and he felt his entire body change into his despised form. But even as it was cool, it couldn’t stop the burning.

Is this what they wanted? To see him suffer? The god knew the answer, and took it. They wanted him to beg, but he wouldn’t give them that satisfaction. It was one thing he could do. Why beg for reprieve, when it wouldn’t be given in the first place?

What seemed like centuries, had in reality, only been two days. His body was removed from the table, and he was pushed into another room. With a single table and chair. When Loki felt his hands become chained to the chair, he looked into the mirror.

The hawk all but looked back with the director. He nodded, and a group of men like before came in, with more weapons and instruments.

“Let’s see how you heal when we’re done with you, princess.”

Thor had to be in the dark about any of this. Though Loki often called him an idiot and bumbling oaf, he would never allow this.

And Loki wasn’t going to tell him.

~****~

“JARVIS, hack into SHIELD and get me any and all information pertaining to Loki Odinson.” Tony sat back from his suit, sighing.

_There is none sir._

“What do you mean, there is none? Dig deeper, you’ll find something.” The genius sighed. He wanted to know what was happening. The first week was tense for the team. Thor had returned home, leaving his brother in their capable hands.

It pissed Tony off more than anything. They were not baby sitters. Loki owed them nothing, and made that much clear during the attack two years ago. He was happy to send him off to SHIELD. Get the god damn murderer out of his hair.

Bruce seemed to be less around then Tony was used too. The genius knew that sending Loki to SHIELD had set half the team on edge. Clint was happy, but Natasha knew what they were really capable of.

Which is why he decided to hack into the database. Thor had given them some insight on his brothers punishment, and it didn’t sit well.

One year of silence had been ordered from Loki. His lips were sewn shut, and he was sent into the deepest cell of Asgard.

The next year, he spent with ‘mind healers’ as Thor called them. (More like therapists.) He responded well, according to the Thunder God, but had bouts of ‘bad days’. Thor wouldn’t describe those days.

He was still kept in a cell and allowed one visitor a week. It was mostly Thor, but he didn’t go into too much detail about that. It rubbed Tony the wrong way.

Their high council decided that Loki was still a danger, and if he didn’t make up for his ‘debt’, a public execution would be given.

The shit made Tony shutter, and he thought twice about sending Loki to SHIELD. But the ass damn well deserved it. The genius figured this was part of Loki’s plans to get them to trust him, feel sorry for him then he would betray and kill them.

_I found some video footage of Mr. Odinson sir, but I fear you might not like it._ The AI finally responded after a few moments.

“Bring em’ up JAR. I can handle most shit. I am _Iron Man_ remember?” Tony chucked nervously. A video feet came over his screens, and it showed Fury alone in a room with the god. He was pale, frighteningly thin, and cuts were all over his skin. He could faintly make a word out on the gods arm, and that made the genius reach for his trash bin.

“ _What are your plans for coming back?” Fury asked._

Tony looked up, watching the exchange between the two. Loki didn’t answer. The director gave a nod, and a man was in front of him, throwing a hand across his face.

“ _It seems that I haven’t made myself clear.” The director leaned against the table. “No one wants you here, so tell us what your plans are. Are you going to murder each Avenger in their bed? Gain their trust? Make them side with you? Because as far as I can tell, you are unwelcome here.”_

The genius’ eyes bugged out of his head. This wasn’t how SHIELD normally dealt with prisoners. And he was pretty damn sure if Thor knew, SHIELD would be in ruins.

“ _No answer? Think you’re better than us? That you don’t need to answer? Well, there is another week of you here with us. So I think you should give us what we want, and we’ll give you what you want.”_

_The god looked up to the director, a questioning look in his eyes._

“ _Death, is only the beginning.” Fury spoke, and nodded to all the men._

“Shit!!” Tony jumped up. Fury left the room, and let the men do what they wanted. “Cut the feed JARVIS and ask the others to meet me in he living area.”

~****~

Sleep finally overcame Loki in the form of exhaustion. His body was thrown back into the room. He felt the blood drip down his arms, back and shoulders. The magic he was allowed was trying to heal them, but whatever was in the IV bag was preventing that.

They wanted him to bleed.

He briefly dream ed of getting the agents back. But then figured they were  _getting him back_ . This was his punishment. This was what a monster deserved.

People in white coats came in, took his blood, and samples of his hair and skin. One gave him a shot, and another forced a white pill down his throat. That one strangely looked like the little spider.

The god decided he was dreaming.

~****~

“Do we tell Thor?” Steve asked.

“I think he would kill Fury and the ones who touched him.” Bruce looked to the captain. “We have to get him out of there-”

“Why should we?” Clint shook his head. “He’s taking it like a fucking champ. Leave him there another week, and we’ll get him. I still don’t want him here, putting it off will help.”

“I don’t either hawk, but this is all kinds of wrong. Even if I thought he deserved it, you don’t torture someone who has already paid for his crimes in that way.” Tony shook his head. The sound of a door slamming caught their attention, and Natasha walked in, shedding a doctors coat.

“I gave him a really strong pain killer. It’ll subdue the pain for the next couple days.”

“Which will make them hurt him more.” Bruce added. “What was on his arm?”

“ _Monster_.” She breathed, looking a little shaken. “I think we should get him out, and just put him in a room to heal. Then we can go from there.”

“We made a deal with Fury-” Clint began.

“Look, I know he fucked with your head Barton. I know he violated us an any way he knew how too. But this,” Tony pointed to the screen. “Is not justice. This is cruel and unusual punishment. I god damn know that he would have killed us instead of letting that happen.”

“He wants to fucking die, so let them finish him off.” The archer shouted. “Let the blood of the war criminal be on their hands.”

“And start an intergalactic war with Gods? Hell no!” The genius stepped forward.

“You touch him, Fury will be after all of our asses. You agreed to two weeks, you fucking asshole. So did Thor. Leave him, and when Fury is done, then he’ll be in our hands.”

“I would rather have him being useless here, than being a toy for SHIELD.” Tony shook his head.

“You know, I don’t want him where we sleep Tony.” Steve spoke again. “He could murder us in our sleep or something.”

“He could.” Tony added, annoyed. “But we can keep an eye on him here. I doubt he’ll be able to do anything for a while. If he wants to do anything. And I can’t believe Captain America is turning down the chance to turn someone into a goody fucking two shoes.” Tony spat. “We get him, let him do his thing for the debt, then he can go home. I’m weary, yes, but I’d rather not have a dangerous god with a hammer chasing after me.”

“Whatever.” Clint stormed out. Steve shook his head and followed.

“I’ll be of help, but don’t expect me to trust him. Or like him, for any matter.” Natasha nodded, but there was a vulnerability in her features. “They won’t do anything tonight. We can leave in the morning.”

Both men nodded, and went in their separate directions.

Being an Avenger was going to get much harder when tomorrow starts.

 


	2. Chapter Two

“Looks like you get to see someone today.” A guard stepped in, yanking Loki up by his arm. The god didn’t respond, nor did he feel much pain. Whatever he was given had masked the pain, and for that, he was grateful.

He was dragged down the long corridors. Maybe they lied, and were taking him back to the room. His body shuddered at the room. The cuts along his arm burned at the thought of the room.

_Maybe I will die today. That would be nice, would it not?_

“Here’s the criminal director.” The man spoke, tossing Loki onto the floor. He heard gasps. Someone else was in the room.

“God damn it Fury!” That sounded much like the man of Iron. Loki could barely make out the voice though.

“You said two weeks.”

“I didn’t say torture.”

“He’s a war criminal Stark. And he owed us a debt.” The one eyed man replied, and looked to Loki. The god felt his heart jump. He was properly frightened. “He’s not done.”

“Don’t make me call Thor.”

“Thor knew. We told him his brother was not going to have a hay day with us. He knew of what we could do.”

So Thor did know? Loki wanted to laugh bitterly. Of course, claim false kindness toward him, then betray him. He deserved it, of course.

_Please just kill me._

“You don’t deserve death, you little shit!” One of Fury’s men shouted, and Loki realized he had spoken that out loud. A fist came in contact with his face. “You’ve still got five days here. We’re not finished.”

“I find that you are, Fury.” The other voice stepped in. “We didn’t sign anything. Loki is our responsibility. I’m taking him back to the tower, and we’ll decide things when he’s able to fucking walk on his own.”

“If he steps one fucking toe out of line, we’re taking him back.” The director shouted. Loki felt something on his back and nearly jerked away at the contact.

“Shit. No, just.” It was the Man of Iron. “I’m trying to help, so please stop moving Jack Skellington.”

Loki obeyed, and the man lifted him easily. Was he really that thin?

“Well shit. We’re gonna try to stuff your face first. I should not be able to carry you.”

The god didn’t hear too much, for he felt himself drift into unconsciousness when they were in the contraption called a car. He vaguely saw the widow again, her face masked in calmness.

~****~

“So um, this is it?” Tony looked at Bruce, who watched him, then Loki cautiously.

“They didn’t give you any problems?” He asked, motioning to the bed. Tony set Loki down, mindful of the blood stains on his arms from the gods back.

“If he steps out of line, we’re all in for shit, but that’s it.” The genius shrugged. “He’s all yours doc.”

Bruce nodded, and Tony sat in a near by chair. For some reason, seeing someone as powerful as Loki, bent and broken to the pieces he was in, made him angry.

SHEILD had done this. The government organization the worked alongside with, brutally tortured someone with no way of fighting back.

Tony wanted to physically hurt _anyone_ who would do this. He had to calm himself from, from taking his suit and destroying the men he saw on the feed.

Two years was a long time, and if Tony could see something worth saving in this god, then the others should as well. He was too disappointed in them at the moment. They weren’t as accepting as he hoped. (It was scary though, of how much he actually _wanted_ to help Loki. How much he had _seen_ of himself in those eyes.)

Tony would not trust Loki, not at all. But he could help by getting Loki to trust those around him.

It took a couple hours to get everything cleaned. The god was filthy, and something was preventing his magic from healing the wounds. Several stabs were found under the poor choice of clothing. There were broken ribs, fingers, and even his wrist was fractured.

“Why aren’t you healing?” The doctor asked, wrapping what he could. Tony was helping, keeping Loki’s arm straight as Bruce wrapped the bandages around him.

The word carved into the gods arm made him really want to vomit into the nearest trash can. He wrapped it gently, noticing his body twitching.

Bruce gave a nod, before leaving and Tony just sat back in the chair, contemplating. Loki was whiter than the sheets lining the bed and looked _worse_ than when they had fought him a couple years ago.

“You are not going to kill me?” His voice was weak, but Tony looked up, finding Loki’s eyes open slightly. “I thought it would be most satisfying to you and your Avengers.”

“I don’t believe in killing someone as punishment.” Tony shrugged, keeping himself planted in the chair.

“Even after what I have done?” The god whispered, barely moving as Tony continued to watch him.

“You’re not healing.” The genius decided against answering, and stated the obvious.

“They gave me some concoction of a suppressor. It was in my arm for two days, that I know of.”

“They prevented your healing?” His eyes widened as his heart sped up. “That’s, that is just wrong.”

“It is something that I had deserved.” Loki pulled his arm away. “I thank you for yours and Dr. Banners help. But I shall be going to Asgard soon. It is what is wished upon SHIELD and your team.”

He didn’t call it home, and Tony filed it away. Something, just didn’t feel right.

The god slowly turned to his side, curling into the blankets. Tony just stared at him, noticing widespread blood stains on the back of his shirt, but decided to leave them for the moment.

“I’ll be back in couple hours to check your progress Loki.” He spoke quietly, looking down at the file he grasped. When the god didn’t answer, he left, closing the door behind him. “JARVIS?”

_Yes Sir?_

“Keep an eye on Bambi. Let me and Bruce know if anything looks suspicious, or if he attempts to harm himself.”

_I will keep an eye on Mr. Laufeyson and alert with any problems._

Tony walked to the elevator, placing the floor on lock-down in the process. He didn’t want any of the team down there.

The genius felt more sorry for the god than he should.

~****~

Dinner was silent, but they were all seated together. Steve always made sure of it. They needed the time to calm or just be together and not fighting super-villains.

“I’m just gonna say it.” Tony set his for down, shaking his head. “You’re all on fucking edge. Loki’s asleep, and has been for the whole day. His wounds won’t heal for one to two weeks according to big green and JARVIS.” The genius answered, ignoring the rest of the team. “They gave him something that prevented whatever magic he has from healing his body. I’ve run analysis. It’s still heavily in his system. Whatever it was also slowed his metabolism greatly. They were expecting him in their custody.”

“I thought SHIELD didn’t have a way of preventing magic?” Steve spoke up, voice quiet, and food long forgotten.

“It somehow prevents healing magic. Since he doesn't have all his powers, we can't really know if it'll top all magic. He can only heal himself if needed and others, as Thor explained before.”

“Is he going to kill us in our sleep? Because I would really love to launch an arrow through his eye.”

“I’m sure he would welcome that.” Tony sighed, running his hands over his face. “Last time he spoke, he asked if I was going to kill him. Also begged patchy to kill him this morning.” Tony whispered

“He doesn’t deserve to die.” Steve frowned.

“Tell that to the people he killed cap!” Clint jumped up.

“How about you tell that to the people you’ve killed too, birdbrain?” Tony shouted right back, placing his hands on the table. “I’m sure they’d love to shoot arrows through not only your eyes, but everywhere else.”

“That’s completely different.”

“Is it Barton? Because last time I checked, the only person with a fucking spotless ledger was Steve. And even he has some, but those were fucking Nazi’s so I don’t know if that fucking counts!”

“Guys, calm down.” The widow finally spoke, pushing her plate away. “We’ve got to just push our feelings aside and deal with this. Loki is weak, and I mean, really weak. Stark lifted him like a feather from Fury’s feet.”

“Maybe we should get some of that suppressant shit, and use it full time.” Clint sank back into his seat.

“Just stop talking Clint before I make sure you dangle from the top of the tower.” Natasha snapped, glaring at the archer. If it was possible to turn invisible, he would have. “Clint’s out of this discussion.”

“What do we do when he gets his strength back, and possibly decides to get rid us?” Steve asked, leaning back. They did not need the stress of a psychotic god attempting to kill them.

“We can speak with Thor about Bambi’s head when he returns-” He was tired. So, so tired of hearing the _same_ exact argument over, over, and over again.

They were a team. They _needed_ to do this _together_ or wouldn’t be as effective.

The sound of thunder caught their attention and Thor landed right outside.

“Impeccable timing.” Tony snarked, rising from his seat.

“My friends, I have come to check upon your progress, as well as my brothers. The director informs me he was released early?” Thor smiled, setting the hammer down.

“Thor, did you know what Fury was doing?” Tony asked, sliding in front of the Thunderer the fastest.

“I was told he was to be incarcerated. The director sought to either kill my brother, or keep him for two weeks, like you hadwanted. I could not do much else.”

“You couldn’t maybe, I don’t know, tell them to let him be a consultant or something?” The genius nearly spat, trying to keep his anger at bay. Tony didn’t like feeling angry. Though nothing like Bruce, he hated the anger and what he could _do_ if he was _always_ angry. “They have a way of suppressing healing Thor. They denied a natural thing in, in favor of pain and torture!”

“I,” Thor paused, seeming to process the information. He did not look happy when he spoke next, and his voice was tight, stiff, something that was rarely heard. “There was not much else I could do friend Stark. Loki is to repay his debt, and thus preventing his execution. I could not do more.” The thunder god sighed heavily, shoulders falling.

“Bull shit-”

“It was far better than the alternative of letting Director Fury keep him for eternity.” Tony felt thunder rumble outside, taking a cautious step back. “I come only to tell you that I will be here once a week to see his progress. It is all Odin would allow.”

“So you’re leaving the shit with us?” Clint asked, but backed away when Natasha threw him another nasty glare.

“I believe he will do well in your capable hands my friends. As for I am not allowed to be here during his progress.”

“Alright, say he does well or whatever, how is he supposed to help us?” The genius stepped forward and asked.

“Loki’s magic is suppressed, except for healing. The magic still courses through his veins, so powerful that Odin could not fully remove everything. The healing will stay. If you are called out to battle and do require him, Loki can teleport with this.” Thor held up a necklace with a small green stone on the end. “If my brothers magic is truly needed, then you can place this around his neck and it will supply him with enough to get through a situation.”

“How do we hide that from him? He can just steal it!” Clint’s voice grew, nearly off pitch.

“That is not how it works. He cannot touch it, or freely place it upon himself. It must be placed upon him by one of you five, or myself.”

“And what if he finds a way to access his full magic without the necklace?” The captain stepped beside Tony, hands folded neatly behind his back.

“My brothers magic is locked away, deep inside his soul. When he allows himself to change, to grow, and only when he has truly earned the trust of himself of those around him, father will allow him to find it.”

 _**Redemption** _ _._ Tony’s mind went on a whirlwind. It almost felt impossible. Loki, the broken and battered god (kind-of-god but essentially mortal) was being allowed the chance to better himself.

_**He feels as if it’s already a lost cause. No one will believe it-** _

“I am willing to go with this. I don’t trust Loki, but I trust Thor. If he thinks this is possible, then maybe it is.” Natasha spoke up, pulling the genius from the rapid thoughts dancing in his mind.

“I would like to be in charge of the necklace.” Steve looked to Thor. “Since no one will want it, as leader,” Tony snorted, the captain immediately glaring at him. “I’ll hold the responsibility.”

Thor hesitantly set the necklace in Steve’s waiting hand.

“Captain, you realize what you are doing?” Thor asked.

“Yes, yes I do.” The man responded, standing tall and proud.

“I’ll be his co-captain in watching over Bambi then,” Tony added. “You can’t do this alone. I have a huge fucking feeling this is going to be the death of me, and I am honestly the only one who goes near him-”

“It is safest to keep around yourself.” The thunder god nodded, then looked upon the rest standing off to the side. “I am severely disappointed in the rest of you Avengers.”

“Wait, you dump this on us, in _Avengers_ tower, and tell us we’re disappointing?” Clint’s voice pitched as his eyes widened and turned cold. “We didn’t have to agree with guarding your psychotic brother, okay, oh grand god!”

“No, but I hoped if Loki could find a place among anyone, it would be you. His fate might be different.” Thor nodded sadly. “I must leave-”

“Wait Thor, I have some questions.” Tony stepped around the others, watching Steve tuck the necklace away. The captain made a strange face, briefly laying his palm upon the small crystal.

“It’s looking for a bond.” Thor looked to the necklace briefly, then back to Bruce. “Though his magic is favoring Captain Rogers, he is not who it chooses.”

“Well no score for captain spandex.” He turned his attention to Thor. “My main inquiry, is why. Why is Loki so defeated?”

_**What happened to break that magnificently terrifying mind we have all encountered?** _

“I fear Odin’s punishment broke him.” Thor frowned, looking away. “My mother and I, we begged for this in the beginning. To be allowed the chance I was. To become greater, but he did not see it. The people of Asgard wanted retribution. As king-”

“He had to put his people before his son. Yea, I can see how Loki might have lost it.” The man groaned, running a hand over his face.

_**Severe daddy issues. Sound familiar?** _

“I could only see him every so often, friend Stark.” And he could _feel_ the guilt radiating from the thunderer. “When Loki came to attack Midgard, before, he had fallen through a place titled the Void. He let go of our fathers staff, determined to die after our disagreement.”

“Wait, Loki is suicidal then?” His eyes widened. “That would have been good information to, you know, _have access too!”_

“I fear he is lost. I could not stop him from deciding his fate-”

“Yet, you decide his fate, and let him be _tortured_ by SHIELD, which, you know, made him even worse! He expects me to kill him. He wished for it!” Tony shouted, catching all the others attention from inside. He balled his hands up, not _caring_ if they watched. Someone had to do _something_ about the lack of family, or morals, in this situation.

“You do well to calm down Anthony Stark. I am not here to fight you. I had not known-” Thor held his hands up, signaling he didn’t want it, but Tony continued.

“I know he’s responsible for the attack. But letting him get to the point of _begging_ for death, and declaring himself a monster is not a punishment. It is _beyond_ a punishment Thor. It’s pure physical and mental _torture,_ and the All-King or what _ever_ the fuck his name is, _allowed_ it! Did you ever listen to his side of the story?”

“Loki has always been treacherous and full of trickery and lies. He could of not spoken of the truth, and father would not allow that opportunity. At least not to me. He is to repay his debt, no matter the cost-”

“No matter the cost,” Tony laughed bitterly and calmed himself down. “God only knows what you allowed to be done to him.”

“I would never intentionally harm my brother-”

“I have seen the way he flinches away from you.” The genius shook his head. “You allowed this. Allowed something else to happen to him, and that’s what made him break. Now if you don’t mind, I’m going to do my job.”

“Be wary of his lies man of iron.” Thor growled, but there was something in his eyes. Tony knew that look. Guilt.

“Hey big guy,” Tony walked out, the others behind him. “I know all about the god of lies, the whole silver-tongue thing. But I know _torture_ , and I know what it feels like to have someone who you _trust_ , betray you. Loki trusted you. You can’t trust him, yea, I know. None of us can, but he never attempted to kill _you_.

“He’ll mope around like your not his brother. But _I’ve_ heard him call you that, and _that_ means he has some sort of distorted trust in you. And yet, you allowed him be tortured. And, and beaten, and who knows what else.”

“Stark-” Steve began to interrupt, but Tony was having _none_ of it.

“Don’t expect him to trust you.” He spat, grinding his teeth and balling his hands up again. “He’s scared of you, Thor. Of us, and of any other living creature that comes near him, and I _will_ find out why. You did what you could, _whatever_ , you could have done so much more.”

“Father-”

“He’s the king of all, I fucking _get_ it Goldilocks, however, you consider Loki your brother. And you didn’t treat him that way.”

Thor’s face fell, and Tony knew he hit a nerve. With a huff, the genius flexed his fingers and closed his eyes to let the anger fall.

“I shall return within the week fellow Avengers.” The thunder gods voice boomed, and he flew off.

“You’re taking this more seriously than I thought you would.” Bruce spoke up calmly, all surrounding Tony who still felt upset. (Angry. So, so angry, how could a _brother_ allow that. How, how could _family_ not see the issues that needed fixing?)

“Don’t set a broken, bleeding _person_ begging for death and frightened of his brother in front of me then.” He snarled in response.

“Frightened? How do you know that?” Steve frowned, hands nervously clasping and unclasping behind his back.

“Loki flinches away from Thor. He did when we were discussing what to do with him. He’s scared of what Thor might do. So therefore, Thor has either done something, or allowed something to happen. Something to make his own brother so scared.”

“Listen Stark, I know you see something worth saving here, but just don’t get upset if it doesn’t work, alright?” Steve spoke, while Bruce patted his shoulder lightly.

Tony had his issues with the god. He knew they all did, but when they result to violence for a man _begging_ for death, it made him think less of them.

They made each other better. Why couldn’t they try to make the villain better?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who responded to the last chapter! It helped me greatly!


	3. Chapter Three

He shuffled noisily in the sheets, the nightmares plaguing his mind once more. So much, there was so much shredding his once magnificent mind to pieces, that the dark thoughts became overwhelming.

The nightmares of torture, longing for a death that cannot be allowed, would never cease. Even when Thor would try to reason. Try to get the once god to break down and admit he was wrong.

And oh, how Loki learned to fear his brother friends, and father, and any other person with more strength than his own.

‘ _Do you not see that this is what you deserve,_ _lie-smith_ _?’_ Sif’s voice echoed in Loki’s pain induced mind. _‘Speak of your wrongs. Lie like you will always do, and maybe your father will release you.’_

He did not answer. He  _never_ could answer with the silver cords running through both his lips. With blood being the only thing he tasted for too  long.

‘ _Fight back all you want prince.’_ Fandral’s voice would make the trickster strain more, fight more, but it came to no use. Loki’s hands were bound, and the others were taking advantage of that. _‘This is your punishment. You are to take it. As the king allows.’_

Loki dug his fingers into the sheets, damp with his own perspiration. The guards. Volstagg, Fandral, Sif… Always using his weakened body for a practice, for their relief of a frustrating day.

‘ _Jotun, a monster, never deserving of the punishment the All-Father has so willingly given you.’_ They would whisper in his ear, shoving Loki to his knees. _‘If I were king, you would be locked away with no chance of seeing the daylight ever again.’_

The nightmare relinquished itself, forcing the god to jolt up from his slumber. He was still in agony, the injection site burning as his body continued to try and heal itself.

Loki forced himself out of the unfamiliar bed. He remembered SHIELD, the magic dampening still coursing through, burning his veins, blood boiling as the lacerations tried to heal, only to bleed even more. The man of iron bringing him to the monster to heal.

The word torn into his arm, continuing to sear. Continuing to twinge.

Pain he so devastatingly deserved.

This was to be his punishment now. To be healed, made better, then to be thrown back into the hands of the enemy only to be broken and shattered once more.

_No. This is not what I even deserve._

_I deserve death. She would be oh so pleased. I could prevent the darkness._

He spied the windows, how fragile the glass would be. It was easy to throw the man of iron through, so why not a chair? His strength may be diminished, but a chair could be simple for the glass. Enough to break it.

And throw himself to a most certain death.

~****~

“I’m all for it Tony.” Natasha sat across from him, eying the genius carefully. “If we can make the change, why not? But does he want it? From what we’ve seen, he’s just an empty shell.”

“You know what it’s like to be broken to the barest existence Natasha.” He replied, biting his thumb nervously. “SHIELD didn’t do this to him. It was already there. From two years of torture under his fathers hand. From before New York.”

“Still doesn’t prove if he wants it.”

“Did you?”

There was an understanding silence between the two. Natasha knew that given different circumstances, she wouldn’t have changed. Not if Clint had made his original call.

The spy would be ever grateful for the archer. For the team she could now call her family.

_Sir, Mr. Laufeyson is attempting to break the window._

“What?” Tony jumped up, knocking a glass off the table in the process. The shattering distracted him momentarily, but his feet carried him forcefully to his floor, with Natasha right at his back.

_A few minutes ago Mr. Laufeyson awoke from what could be a nightmare, and began to throw a chair at the window. Most is shattered._

“Did you call anyone else?”

_Dr. Banner is en-route, as the captain is already in the room._

Tony broke into a sprint, but was stopped when Natasha held him back.

“Is it safe for you?” She asked, outside his door. They could hear the struggle, and yet another shatter of glass. “Your emotions are on high alert Tony. We know where that leads-”

_The window has been breached-_

Tony just nodded, rushing into the room. The chilled air forced his eyes to adjust within the darkness.

“Let me die, it is what you want!” His eyes fell upon the god. It wasn’t just the chair that had been thrown at the window.

Loki’s arms were streaked with blood, the red staining Steve’s shirt. The captain was holding Loki back, attempting to pull him away from the edge.

_**He wants this so, so much** _ _._ Tony shook his head, entering the room further. He  _should_ be upset about the windows (Really, what did this guy have against glass?) but he  _knew_ there was so much more.

“I say let him jump.” Clint bared his teeth. “Let it be done!”

“Natasha, take Barton away!” Tony demanded, the widow already grabbing Clint by the arm. “Steve can you get Loki to the infirmary? No fucking windows there-”

“Just eradicate me, as you all have planned.” Loki was screeching, the sound horrifyingly unnatural. He attempted to pull away from Steve, but was too weak to break the soldiers hold. “I know I am unwelcome, this death would be celebrated amongst the stars, and you shall be praised! My death, your recognition!”

“Sonova-” Tony attempted to help Steve, but couldn’t get a grasp on Loki’s arms. The god thrashed even more against him, kicking at Tony. “Bruce, you have to do something, he’s bleeding a lot-”

The doctor remained calm, before tossing a syringe toward Tony, letting it land in the inventors grasp. Tony lunged, shoving the needle relentlessly into Loki’s arm, hearing him snarl against Steve’s arms.

“Just, just do it…” Loki slurred, head falling back. “They will send me back to _him_. I, I would rather,”

Steve caught Loki, lifting the god easily into his arms.

“We have to keep him restrained-” Bruce started, kicking some glass away. The man was tired. Tired of his tower being trashed, and just plain tired. Of everything.

“That would make things worse.” Steve responded, shaking his head. “He’d think we’re keeping him from anything, everything else.”

“Can we get him to medical please?” Tony took a breath, calming himself. “Steve, I need you to stay around for a bit. You’re the strongest, if crazy wakes soon, you can prevent an incident without hurting him.”

“Sure thing.” Steve nodded curtly, immediately walking toward the elevator.

“I take it you want me to keep Barton away for a while.” Natasha’s voice came over the intercom, distracting the genius momentarily.

“Do what you can, I’ll deal with this on my own.” He responded, stepping in and pushing the button to go down. “I just need Brucey to check him for any severe injuries.”

The doctor nodded, and Tony could tell he was weary. But given the chance to help someone, Bruce normally grabbed at it.

Tony was determined to help in anyway he could.

~****~

“How is he doing, doc?”

Bruce turned to the annoyingly familiar voice, remembering that he sent it away. So it could rest and let him  _work_ .

“Hasn’t woken since the sedative, but are you really here to check on his progress?”

“I need the report physically to send to Fury. I won’t send it through JARVIS. I’m sending it through the company, for legal reasons.” Tony folded his arms and leaned casually against the door frame.

“Are they labeling this as a mishap?”

“Not yet, but if they find proof of him loosing control again, they will attempt to take him. Crazy bastard.” He sighed, scrubbing his face momentarily. “Natasha’s gonna do the best she can, but she has SHIELD on her ass to interrogate him, because Clint is still considered compromised. And not in the good way. I have a dreaded feeling that I may be the only one wanting this. Please tell me I’m wrong?”

“Natasha needs to be alongside Clint, considering this is a trying time for him.” Bruce clicked the pen a couple times, before setting the clipboard down. “I, I don’t know how I feel about ‘saving’ someone with, with _his_ track record. I’m all about redemption, believe me. If I had not found you guys, I could possibly still be severely out of control. But you, Tony Stark, have more in your heart than I could ever dream of. If _you,_ of all people, think this is possible, then I will follow as much as I can. It won’t be much, Loki mentally needs improvement before interacting with any of us. We’re not necessarily therapists.”

“Hercules doesn’t seem to see the difference.” Tony chuckled, quickly grabbing a paper from the clipboard. “Is he okay?”

“Fine for now.” Bruce sighed, sliding his glasses off.

“Take this up to Natasha. If I bother her again, she might kill me. Bruce, I can’t die. I have a board meeting.”

The doctor scoffed, and Tony laughed too, both realizing how ridiculous that sounded.

“You know what to do if it gets bad.” Bruce patted his shoulder, and walked out of the room.

Tony grabbed a chair, throwing himself in it before resting his feet on the bed.

There was, a lot, going between the team right now. Clint was on terrible edge, his want for revenge was worse than Tony had ever seen in  _anyone_ . Natasha was being cool and collected, as she ever could in these type of situations, but the genius could just  _tell_ that vengeance was somewhere behind those terrifying eyes.

Honestly, Steve was just sitting around with the necklace around his neck. Tony knew Steve didn’t know what to necessarily do, but he could be here.

Someone else should be here. Because it would help.

“Why are you showing any sort kindness?” The voice speaking was so broken, so frightened that, that Tony had the most difficult time believing that it could belong to a being that tried to destroy Manhattan.

“I don’t believe in torture. I don’t believe in harming someone that has been bent beyond recognition of themselves-”

“You can easily murder me for what I have done, and yet you choose not too.” Loki interrupted him, pulling weakly on the restraints with a growl. “I do not understand this concept. I do not need to be pitied or, or shown any sort of kindness. I deserve this death.”

“No one deserves to die, Loki.” Tony answered honestly, squeezing the bridge of his nose. “And when we can trust you enough for your own safety, I will remove the restraints.”

“That will be a lifetime Stark.”

“Call me Tony.”

“I do not wish to do so.”

“I know you do not wish it Bambi, but it would be much easier-”

“Easier for myself to gain your trust, then throw me back to the dogs and let them have their way.” The god growled, pulling against the restraints again, attempting to get any sort of pain from it. “I would rather die a thousand times then be back in that cell on Asgard or within your SHIELD. It would be a disservice to this universe if you continue to allow me to live.”

“Well then, the universe is going to have to deal with it.” The genius replied, calming himself enough. It was infuriating him, the way Loki was acting, but he knew to suspect such behavior. Loki had been tortured and abused. Both verbally and physically, leading him to how his mind is reacting now.

“You are pathetic-”

“You need your rest rock of ages. That button beside you will call a nurse or Bruce in, so use it whenever you feel like or whatever.”

“I will not condone your pity-”

“I don’t pity you.” Tony responded, standing towards the door. “You were of strong mind and heart at one point, as what we have been told. You’ve done bad things, _terrible_ things. Even though you tried to take over our world, you were still confident and a completely different person at that point. Whatever has been done to you, was wrong. And I hope one day, you will understand that.”

Loki trembled. Tony watched him, waiting for the backlash to come. Waiting for the outburst.

“Like I said, get some rest. It is late, and I will hopefully, return in the morning.”

All the god did was let out a shaking breath, and turn his head away.

It was an improvement, but they were still so far behind. Tony wasn’t going to give up, and hopefully, he could pull the others into it as well.

It was the best he could do.

~****~

Tony stared at Natasha, shocked at the items sitting in front of him.

“SHEILD thinks if he gets out of control again, we can use these-”

“That’s wrong.”

“It’s only an option. They would lock on, and inject him with a sedative-”

“You cannot use those shackles on him. They would make his trust so much worse than it already is.”

“We need to have something. Bruce, you, or even Steve might not always be here to help contain him if all plans go to waste.”

“You don’t really think-”

“Listen, I’m all up for second chances, redemption, the whole thing.” Tony watched Natasha unravel a little more than he had ever seen. “But this is Loki. This is a man who killed innocent people, and tried to kill us, just so he could take over our world. He failed, and got his punishment.”

“You would have been the same way if Barton hadn’t made a different call.”

“I wasn’t as far gone as Loki is.” She raised an eyebrow, folding her arms neatly against her chest. “I, I want it to work Stark. I want to see Loki work with us. But wanting is different from what actually is present.”

“It shouldn’t have happened the way it did.” The genius muttered.

“You don’t know what happened.” Natasha sat on the desk beside Tony. He watched her carefully, realizing that this was taking it’s toll on everyone. “We don’t even know what happened before he went crazy on Thor. From what was said, Loki was fine until he was banished, and didn’t take well to the throne.”

“I have a feeling there is a lot that we don’t know, or not going to know.” The genius replied, and ran a hand through his hair, making it stand up. “The best I can do is work with him. Alright? No one else, just me. You have to stick by Clint, Bruce has got to keep the green rage monster inside, and Steve’s Captain America. He needs to keep his sanity.”

“You shouldn’t have to. Thor should have been able to take care of his own brother, Tony. His own family let this happen, it shouldn’t have to be us, but it is.” Natasha stood back up. “Just, just take these to be safe.”

“I can’t-”

“I’ll make Steve take them, and he isn’t going too. So please.”

Tony sighed, grasping the newly made shackles in his hands. (He could make them so much better) This wasn’t right. But even when those thoughts went through his brain, there was still that little voice in the back. Telling him that he really didn’t know what could happen. That this was just to be cautious.

~****~

Tony stood outside of the infirmary door, really wondering if this was such a good idea. See, the thing was, he was literally  _torn_ . For one, this crazed god was in his building, and who  _knew_ how much chaos he would undoubtedly cause again. Who knew if he would go off the rail and  _murder_ anyone or everyone around him.

He didn’t  _want_ to feel sorry. This man caused so many issues and death in the city. New York  _just_ got back on it’s feet (even though they were almost turned into fucking lizards immediately after Manhattan.)

Even the team was on edge. Clint refused to be near, Natasha sticking by his side. Steve did his duty and helped him. Bruce was just there to be the doctor, because they couldn’t trust anyone else.

He watched the videos, he  _knew_ that face Loki kept when he was around Bruce.

Tony had it once, a long time ago.

The genius pushed the door open, finding Bruce inserting a needle into the IV stuck in Loki’s arm.

“This will help the infection from the gashes lining your back. They’re refusing to heal, as is the injection site from the suppressant.”

“The suppressant SHIELD developed was a way to make the suffering last.” Tony spoke up and both men nearly jumped from the intrusion. “It won’t go away. Not for a while.”

Loki didn’t speak, and Bruce just stood, expelling the syringe into the sharps bin.

“And what brings you here, Tony?”

Oh shit, Bruce had  _that_ tone. And Tony knew  _that_ tone.

“Just, you know, checking in. On progress.” The genius shrugged, walking further into the room.

“Uh huh,” He raised an eyebrow, making that _I’m-still-basically-disappointed-in-you-from-recent-events_ tone prevalent. (Meaning he knew about SHEILD’s magic sedative shackles)

“Well, aaaaaand, I may have come up with something to pull the represent from your system Bambi.” He turned his head to Loki, catching the teensiest flicker of hope in his green eyes (weren’t they blue before? He’d have to look into that…)

“A shock, that you would waste your precious time to do such a thing for a monster, Stark.” Loki’s voice was low, almost dangerous.

“The name is Tony, and if you don’t want it, that’s cool. I mean, it could help you _heal_ , but since you have a rabid death wish, I guess it was a waste of time-”

“ _Tony_!” Bruce caught his attention, and pulled him out of the room. “That was inappropriate!”

“It wasn’t, and _he_ knows it.” Tony snapped back. “He’s gonna pull that card until we come back with something better. Leaving him alone is best. We _should_ wait till he comes to us, not keep watching him like a dog. Plus, JARVIS could keep an eye on him, not you Bruce.”

“He’s got the need to kill himself. I won’t allow that.” The man fumed, and Tony waited a moment to let him get in control again.

“I know he’s your patient, and you care to the extent of a doctor patient relationship. But Loki is not going to make it easy, and you shouldn’t either. Don’t necessarily give him what he wants, but act like it. It might loosen him up. Call him out on his shit.”

“You don’t want him here.”

“You don’t either. None of us do. But if I can help it, I’ll make it certain that he _could_ become someone I want here.” Tony shrugged. “I don’t like him. I _don’t_ have too, but after seeing all the shit SHIELD could do, I’m inclined to allow the chance of helping make him a better person. But he knows we’re going to try that, so treating him the way we are isn’t going to help.”

“I don’t know Tony,” Bruce sighed, sliding his glasses off and rubbing his face.

“Trust me on this okay?”

It took a moment, but the doctor nodded and allowed Tony in the room alone.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for keeping tabs on this story. Life got a little hectic and I went on vacation for a while, and got some ideas. I don't know how often I'll update, but I'll try to do it more often. At least till I get to all my chapters that are finished.
> 
> Let me know what you think!


	4. Chapter Four

“So about your death wish,” Tony grabbed the nearest chair and set it next to the bed, throwing his feet next to Loki’s legs. “Throwing yourself from a building is classy, but come on. I, _you and I_ both know you could do way better.”

Loki fumed for a second and turned his head, looking away from Tony.

_Bingo_ , the genius smirked, arms crossed over his chest.

“You’re a smart guy. Put two and two together.” Tony tossed a band onto the bed, right next to Loki’s hand. He undid the straps holding the tricksters arms down, before leaning back into his seat and watching.

It took a moment, but Loki finally moved his hand toward the band. Slowly, as if it was a ruse, the man grasped it, and Tony could sense the discomfort.

_Obviously things have been given to him for the reasons of harming him._ He cataloged that into his mind for later. It would certainly be of use.

“You mentioned taking the suppressant away.” He spoke so quietly, his voice wavering and caught Tony by surprise. His eyes still inspected the item, fingers treading slowly over the Stark Industries label. (Of _course_ Tony marked everything he made. It was _his_ design anyways.)

“We strap this sucker on you, it’ll pull whatever represent is still in your system out. We analyzed your blood a couple days ago, the shit’s still running strong in your blood stream. It’s gonna hurt, not gonna lie.”

“There is more, is there not?”

“Well yea. You tried to destroy New York, you’re not gonna get off easily Bambi.” Tony replied and took the band back for a moment. “You’ve got a magical trace, we know that. We can’t trace that like the pirate king can, but we can trace you on earth.” He pushed a button, allowing a small red light to flash. “Figured silver would be better since you certainly like gold _way_ too much. I can make a cuff out of leather because of your obsession with that too, or something, not hard. JARVIS, where is our resident psycho?”

_Mr. Laufeyson resides in room 4 on the infirmary floor, sir. Vitals are stable, other than a bit of an elevated heart rate._

“You intention is to keep a leash on me.” Loki stated, eyes staring intently at the bracelet in Tony’s hands.

“Of course, though, a metaphorical leash. You can’t leave the tower, unless one of us is with you. You are certainly not allowed onto the balcony until I deem otherwise. And I am not leaving you alone with anything considered a weapon. Including utensils. We got an understanding Blitzen?”

“I do not understand.” Loki frowned, rolling his wrists unconsciously for a moment. “Why allow me any sort of freedom? Why not lock me into a room until I am deemed useful?”

“Here’s the deal.” Tony leaned forward, resting his arm on the bed. “You’ve done shit. Some _major_ shit. You’ve made people unhappy, and you’ve killed people. Thousands of people in the city below have lost loved ones because of your conniption fit a couple years ago. As upset as I am, I don’t condone torture. Neither does Bruce. You can scream and beg for death all you want, but we’re not going to allow it.

“You have suffered for your crimes against your home rock or whatever the fuck it is, but you’re going to work here until you know what it is to be human. So I’m at least gonna find something for you to do, because despite all this talk of death and shit, you’re really not one to go out without a bang. And you _don’t_ make things easy. _Death_ is the easy way out, and I’m not gonna fucking give it to you, understand that?”

He couldn’t say Loki was  _frightened_ , but the look in his eyes would claim otherwise. Everyone wanted Loki dead, Tony figured he knew that, and that all poured over into the gods pain and suffering induced brain for two years. So Loki wanted death too.

“Wear this, behave yourself, and get the fuck out of this infirmary as soon as possible because if I have to visit you again here, I’m gonna fucking loose it from all the white. Seriously, white hurts the eyes, why did I allow this?” Tony rose, tossing the bracelet toward Loki.

Tony looked to him, before speaking again.

“If you even try to hurt any one of us, anyone in this building, or any civilian, I will make sure SHIELD keeps you forever. You will never see the light of fucking day again, got it?”

He watched Loki gulp nervously, never thinking he would be able to  _threaten_ a god. Or even a kind-of-god right now.

Tony left with a smirk, feeling as if he actually might have gotten through. Only time would tell.

~****~

A few days had passed, and Tony was wondering if Loki was even considering the band. He didn’t hear anything. Bruce hadn’t mentioned anything, and even JARVIS couldn’t detect it.

Even as he watched footage from the room, all Loki would do is curl into a ball and watch the bracelet on the bedside table. He wouldn’t even touch his food, unless Bruce pushed for it. (The man seemed to either be scared, or finally trusted the doctor enough to listen. He was betting on the latter rather than the former, though it wasn’t entirely ruled out.)

Tony wanted this to work. He  _needed_ it too work. Not because it would be fucking fantastic to study Loki’s magic, and use him for their benefit. But because he recognized the look in his eyes. The look of death, of all hope gone, and nothing left to live for except other peoples enjoyment in suffering.

It was like looking in a mirror. Of what Tony’s future could have been if he had taken revenge on the world.

_Sir, Mr. Laufeyson is experiencing excruciating pain and Dr. Banner is out of the building._

“Shit,” Tony jumped up, immediately heading for the infirmary floor. Why was Bruce gone? Especially when they were still on high alert with fucking crazed Loki. “Get uh, get Steve down there just to be safe.”

_Captain Rogers is en-route._

The elevator dinged and Tony rushed through just as the doors opened, his feet hitting the floor as he ran to Loki’s room.

Throwing the door open, Tony stopped for a second. Loki was gripping the sheets, nearly tearing through the fabric. His teeth were ground together, back lifting from the mattress, face scrunched in distress. His veins stressed against his skin, blue slowly forming from the left wrist.

“Give me the low down JARVIS!”

_Mr. Laufeyson slipped the band on and in four seconds, his vitals acted up and he began to feel pain all over._

“Fuck, fuck, FUCK!” He bolted over, grabbing the arm the bracelet settled on. “Why didn’t you call me? Someone should have been here! It’s not reacting like it should-”

“Tony, what is going on?” Steve entered the room, barely a hair out of place. “Why is Loki in pain?”

“Just, just try to hold him down.” The genius breathed out, watching Steve push Loki’s shoulders against the mattress. “JARVIS, is it drawing the suppressant out?”

_Yes, there was much more in his system than I had detected earlier. It seems to replicate in his blood, which explains why he would not heal properly._

“Fucking SHIELD.” Tony exasperated, another cry escaping from Loki’s mouth. “Hey, hey, hey, Bambi, it’s just till your system is clean. No more burning pain when you heal, got it?”

“You,” Loki breathed, and squeezed Tony’s wrist, causing the genius to wince

“Tony-” Steve reached over, but he smacked the captains hand away.

“He’s experiencing pain, not hurting me.” Tony snapped, enduring the slight discomfort.

Tony didn’t know how to react when blood dripped from Loki’s nose, nor when the grip against his wrist tightened, cutting off circulation.

“JARVIS, we better be close to done or I’m ripping it off and that might not allow him to live-”

_His system is nearly clean sir._

“I swear it!” Loki whimpered, and Tony realized that he was in so much agony that the man had no idea where he was. “Always favoring him, all these years. Finally, a chance to make me suffer,” He breathed again, shuddering through the anguish spreading through his veins as the blue color began to retract. “The chance to lock the relic away for eternity.”

“What’s he talking about?” Steve wrapped a restraint against Loki’s wrist, waiting for his grip on Tony to loosen.

“Don’t know cap, kind of not my concern right now.” Tony wiped Loki’s nose, just as his body calmed and collapsed against the bed. Loki grip loosened, and Tony checked his pulse, finding it finally slowing down.

_System is completely clean. Mr. Laufeyson’s heart is slowing to an acceptable rate._

“Alright.” Tony pulled away, somehow satisfied. Loki put the band on. Consciously done it himself, no one pushing him or forcing him. It was a start. Maybe he trusted Tony a bit after their little chat?

No, no he couldn’t. Loki put his trust in people, only to be stabbed in the back. Sure, he had done the same to others, but something similar was the reason he was distrustful.

“Leave this wrist unrestrained. The cuff needs time to adjust.” Tony swatted Steve’s hand away from the strap. His skin started to turn pale again, the blue fading quickly. “Loki had no control over this episode, and I’m hoping there aren’t anymore.”

“What was _that_?” The captain asked, and to Tony’s surprise, he was much calmer than expected. Yet again, he was Captain Fucking America. He could handle a red crazed Nazi.

“That, my friend, was thanks to the hunk-o-junk of floating metal in the sky.”

“SHIELD let this continue?” He scratched his head nervously.

“SHIELD wants information from Loki. They don’t believe he’s on his own. They believe he was _sent_ here from somewhere. They’ll do anything to get that ‘information’ out of him.”

“But this is wrong-”

“This is SHIELD, Cap. This is what that organization does, and Loki is still a threat. They won’t kill him, oh no, they’ll lock his sorry ass up, and torture him for info about _everything_. Because what do we know about Loki?”

“Magic and knowledge of the universe.” Steve finished, letting a shaky breath out.

“No wonder they chose you for the program. You’re the few above average intelligence.” Tony chuckled, looking to Loki’s vitals. They finally stabilized and Loki’s breathing had evened out. “He’s gonna be out a while. We should go.”

“Should he be alone?”

“I’m pretty sure that’s what he wants Cap.” Tony shrugged. Steve walked out and Tony followed, closing the door quietly behind him.

~****~

Both relayed the story to Bruce when he returned. The man looked strained, yet relieved. Loki chose to put the bracelet on, and hopefully that meant something.

_Sir, Mr. Laufeyson is asking for you and Dr. Banner._ JARVIS caught their attention, and both men headed down in silence.

There seemed to be too much of that going through the tower as of late.

Loki looked remarkably better with the suppressant out of his system just for a couple hours. His hair shined better, and though still pale, his skin wasn’t as ghost-like as the previous days had shown.

“You look better Loki.” Bruce smiled, undoing the restraint and lifting his chart. “How are your wounds?”

“Back is healing.” He murmured, gripping his lower arm nervously.

Tony realized the bracelet sat on the same arm that the nasty word was carved on.

“Not your arm?” The genius piped, shoving his hands away. Loki just shook his head and tightened his jaw.

“JARVIS says you asked for us.” The doctor pulled up a chair and sat beside the bed, adjusting his glasses.

“I would like to leave this horrific room. I have seen enough white to last me a lifetime.” Loki was still quiet, eyes distant from the world.

“I just need you overnight, especially since the episode earlier. Thankfully, it wasn’t related to you, just the bracelet.” He shot Tony a look, causing the man to frown. “Then tomorrow, we’ll get you back onto my floor.”

“What are your conditions?” Loki asked quietly, still rubbing his arm. Tony recognized the spot again. Was it still bothering him?

“Conditions?”

“I am here for a reason.” He breathed out shakily. “There is no doubt that you and your team will want me around to work with you. There must be a reason for me to be here. Just biding time until I face my execution.”

“What did we talk about, Rudolph?” Tony grabbed the nearest chair and sank into it sighing heavily. “Remember? I handed you that bracelet, and we had a little discussion on what you’re going to be doing.”

“I wasn’t part of this conversation, Tony.” Bruce interrupted, raising an eyebrow suspiciously.

“Loki’s going to learn what it’s like to be a mortal he so hates.” The genius retorted, throwing his feet up. “He can work at SI. Be my assistant or something, I don’t really care.”

“You would allow a monster-”

“AH!” Tony jumped and covered Loki’s mouth. The god froze, eyes wide and darting across the room in fear. “Lesson numero uno: Stop calling yourself that. Wait, did you understand what I said?”

The god nodded, and Tony removed his hand, fear still etched in Loki’s eyes.

_**Okay, no surprise shutting up. At least not that way** _ _._ He forgot about the lips being bound spiel.

“You can try to call yourself names, god knows you’ve heard them for years bud. You can try to hurt yourself, like the little window incident a few days ago. But I’m not gonna let you take the easy way out, remember? We’ve talked about this, and that,” Tony pointed to the silver band wrapped tightly around the tricksters wrist. “That is your signature. You put that on, you agree to our conditions. Got it?”

Loki swallowed his words, and nodded stiffly.

“Loki, I’ll be right back.” Bruce stood up, and shot Tony a look. The genius sighed, but followed. Once the door closed, Bruce leaned against the wall, hands running over his tired face. “What, was that Tony?”

“I know what I’m doing-”

“Did you not _see_ the way he looked at you? He, he’s scared. Of _us_. All of us. He’s frightened of Thor’s _friends_ , whom he was never frightened of before. I mean, he came to the conclusion of the bracelet himself, which was either because he _wants_ this, or he was _threatened_ into it.” The doctor removed his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“I didn’t threaten him, per say-”

“Tony-” Bruce groaned.

“Well, I just said if he hurts any one of us, SHIELD would love to take him back-”

“How could you say that?”

“Hey, I’m trying to help here!” Tony barked and pointed at the door. “He knows why he’s here. I’m not going to sugar coat it for him. Loki has been through torture, I know. And you know what, so have I. For different reasons. But pretending everything is soft and easy, isn’t going to help him _learn_. He won’t learn to be human if we keep him locked away, and he certainly won’t learn to _trust_ others if we don’t give him incentive.

“They guy is smart, and scared. I _know_ that, big green. I know that’s not really how he is, according to Thor, or what we saw two years ago, and yes, I _believed_ it wasn’t my problem until I saw what SHIELD was doing to him. But, we’re not going to let him off easily because he’s got some issues to settle in his _own_ head. Loki needs to learn. He needs to be taught how to live here, not on Asgard, or wherever he was when he fell. If there is anything we’re good at, it’s helping misfits and learning to be a family Bruce. You know that…”

“You make a valid point.” The doctor closed his eyes for a moment. “I’m still going to be gentle.”

“You wouldn’t be Brucey if you weren’t.” He cracked a smile, setting a hand on Bruce’s shoulder. “Let him out early. JARVIS can watch his vitals in his own room. White, Bruce. So. Much. White.”

“And who designed the building?” The doctor chuckled pushing the door open.

“The building yes, not the paint. Who assumed white was good for patients? I mean, look. He blends in with the sheets.”

Loki’s eyes widened as he looked at his arm, comparing it too the sheets. “I do not understand-”

_**I’ll be hearing that often** _ _._ Tony sighed with a smile. “Just means you’re pale Bambi. Barely any color in your skin. Unless you count turning into a smurf, which, I thought was awesome, by the way.”

“Smurf?” The man raised an eyebrow. Bruce smirked, and Tony chuckled again.

“Blue. You turned blue.”

“That is a form I wish for not a soul to see, man of iron. You might do well to wipe the memory from your mind.” Loki’s voice dropped, too quiet, too _sad_.

“Why though?” The genius shoved his hands in his pockets again and walked closer to the bed. “I thought it, it was fascinating-”

“That is the monster that lies beneath.”

“What did I say about that word?”

“My entire childhood I was taught to hate that _thing_ your eyes laid on. Upon learning that I was one of them, how could I not think I was not some sort of demented _creature_? I am chaos, adding my birth status to the potion proved to those around me what I truly was. A monster. Born in ice and rage. A runt left to die by my true parentage, only to be discovered by another. To be used as political chess piece in the eyes of the All-Father.” Loki seethed, grinding his teeth together as his heart rate sped up. “Just a relic, locked away until I am of use to anyone who will have a _use_ for me.”

Tony really needed to ask Thor about this monster thing, because telling Loki not to use the word, wasn’t going to work. Loki sincerely believed himself to be a monster.

And for some reason, Tony actually believed he wasn’t.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter, I hope you guys enjoy! I really love writing this story and I'm hoping to incorporate other story lines from the movies in here. We'll see!
> 
> Thank you to those who responded to the last chapter, your opinion and comments have made me want to keep going with it.
> 
> Have a wonderful weekend lovely readers.


	5. Chapter Five

Thor landed gracefully on the terrace and the doors to the tower opened for him. Tony waved him over to the table, having anticipated his arrival from last week helped the genius figure out a good time for the thunderer to arrive.

“My friends, how are you fairing?” He smiled, setting the hammer down beside him.

“Alright, all things considered.” Bruce answered. Clint had his arms folded, Natasha sat at the archers side, face stone. Steve’s eyes were soft and concerning, and Tony was messing on his tablet.

“Your brother tried to throw himself out one of my windows.” Tony got to the point, setting the tablet down. “He’s got a knack for breaking them.”

“I, I did not think Loki would do such a thing.” Thor frowned. “I thought he was better-”

“Obviously not-” Clint growled and Tony shot him a glare, silencing him again.

“He’s figuring that _everyone_ wants him dead. Including the people on your side of the rainbow. JARVIS, bring up the footage from the window debacle.” Tony turned his gaze toward the holographic screen floating above the table.

‘ _Let me die, it is what you want!’_ Loki’s shrill cry made him shudder, but he continued watching, making sure Thor was too. The god needed to see this. He _needed to see_ the mental turmoil his adopted brother was going through.

‘ _Just eradicate me, as you all have planned.’_ They watched Loki was scream, struggling to in Steve’s arms _. ‘I know I am unwelcome, this death would be celebrated amongst the stars, and you shall be praised! My death, your recognition!’_

Bruce tossed the syringe as he remembered, and Tony had injected Loki. The god was falling weak against Steve, still muttering under his breath.

‘ _Just, just do it… They will send me back to him. I, I would rather,’_ And then he had fully passed out, blood dripping down his arms, onto Steve and the carpet.

“Cut the feed. Now, bring up what our resident trickster is up to at the moment.” Tony waved the screen away and another came up.

The view was simple. It was the spare room on Bruce’s floor. They allowed Loki back last night, thinking it was better for him.

Sad thing was, it wasn’t.

The drug (as both Tony and Bruce currently dubbed it) had caused a severe addiction. Loki’s body was craving it, and even he didn’t know how to react to that. Tony figured Loki had never been addicted to anything resembling it before.

He was curled on the bed, shaking and attempting to control himself, but it wasn’t working. Loki scratched at the bandage covering the word carved into his skin. Tony knew that he either wanted to pull it off or cut through it.

‘ _Father please.’_ The god started, hugging his knees like a child crying for their parents. _‘I could have done it for you. For all of us.’_

“He won’t eat, he won’t sleep. I had him eating at least a little, but when we processed the suppressant from him, this is what happened.” Bruce pointed to the screen. “Tonight I’m going to have to sedate him _again_. I need to know what happened Thor. Someone messed with his head. And after SHIELD had him, the drug they gave him caused a ruthless addiction in a week!”

“That’s not all.” Tony brought up a photo from SHEILD’s database. “There is so much more. Did Loki ever tell you what happened before he came to earth?”

Thor sat for a moment, lost in thought.

“He, he did. I was not to be listening, but Loki is my brother, and I needed to hear what he had to say.” The thunderer sighed, crossing his arms defensively, upset about something. “My brother, as you know, is of Jotun decent.”

“The Frost Giants, yes?” Natasha asked.

“Yes. Enemies of Asgard, of most of the nine realms. When I was banished for my arrogance, Odin fell into his sleep early. The stress from myself and from Loki finding out his true parentage. I had not known at the time, but it tore him. He ascended throne, being the only one in line.

“Loki came to Midgard and told me that father had died, and that mother had never wanted to see me again. But my friends, Lady Sif and The Warriors Three came, and Loki sent the Destroyer. He had let the Jotuns in, so he could kill Laufey and begin to exterminate their race-”

“Why would he do that? Why would he destroy his own people?” Steve sat up, as at tentative as always.

“As children, we were taught to fear them. That they were monsters that ate misbehaved children in the night-”

“Well shit.” Tony threw his head back, annoyed with the words that just left Thor’s mouth. “Of course. He had a mental break down, right? That’s when you guys fought and you broke the rainbow bridge of friendship.”

“Yes. He, he was dangling from fathers scepter and let go.”

“Why did he let the Jotuns in?” Bruce asked.

“I do not know, though I believe it to be because I was not ready for the throne. Our trip that had me banished proved that.” The god bowed his head letting out a breath.

“So then, Loki lets go, and falls into, the, the Void, I believe?” Tony began, tapping his reactor.

“He expected death. But from what I heard, he fell and fell into the vast darkness of the universe. Until he landed with the Other and his Chitauri. He spoke of the mind gem, I could not hear very well after father slammed the door closed.”

“So wait, Bambi knew he would die, and yet he survived. Your brothers been suicidal for years, and you just let him be tortured? How, how does that even work?” The genius shook his head, anger filling his chest.

“I could not prevent the punishment of the king.” Thor growled. A rumble of thunder rolled outside, rain pouring almost immediately. “Do you not think I tried, man of iron? To save my brother from a punishment he did not deserve?”

“Oh he deserved it-”

“Barton!” Steve snapped. Tony watched his eyes turn cold and stand as Captain America. “If you cannot handle this, then I will consider benching you.”

“Isn’t that a little harsh, Steve?” Bruce asked quietly, fiddling nervously with his hands.

“Yes, it is.” Steve answered, but Tony interrupted him.

“We have been asked by a fellow Avenger and _friend_ to help with his psycho of a brother, who is clearly not in the right state of mind. And clearly hasn’t been for a very long time. Thor is putting his trust in _us_ , as a team, and if _you_ can’t deal with it Barton, then you are much weaker than I thought.”

“Tony!” Steve and Bruce shouted together, but he ignored them.

“We’re supposed to be the good guys here!” The genius barked, feeling his usual composure drop. “We catch the bad guys, yes. But torturing, I, at least do not condone. It is morally unacceptable to allow Loki to be punished again and again-”

“Yet who was the one who went after his captors and weapons?” Clint snarled, up from his seat. “And killed most of them, if I read the file correctly.”

“That was a long time ago.” Tony’s mouth went into a straight line. “We either do this together, as a _team_ , or I will do this on my own.”

“Now, slow down there Tony.” Steve stepped forward, but Tony just turned away.

“It’s been me, and partially Bruce. He aided wounds, I’ve kept an eye on Loki. I’ve spoken with him. I’ve tried to _calm_ him and made sure that he knows what needs to happen. Unlike you. When have any of _you_ gone down there to check on him? Just to check, not be called down?”

The silence answered his question.

“Like I said, we either do this, _as a team_ or I will take him to Malibu, and do this alone.” Tony’s hand was flat on the table, eyes watching the team carefully.

“I,” Steve started, and the others looked to him. Tony prayed he was going to use his Capness to steer this correctly. “I think we should do this, together. Loki, is Thor’s brother. If he, and Tony could see something worth saving in him, we should be able to see it also.”

“But what about the people he’s killed, huh?” Clint asked, and Tony could tell the archer was trying not to scream. “There are so many people dead-”

“There are many dead, because of myself.” Bruce spoke up quietly, arms crossed. “I even hurt someone I love dearly, because I put my work first.”

“I built weapons that were killing the very people I was trying to protect.” Tony closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. “We have all done something unsavory in our lives. This is a chance to work together, and make better something that was lost.”

“Loki, sane or not, is valuable to earth.” Natasha spoke, face still emotionless, but Tony could see _something_ in her eyes. _**You’ve been there too, Nat. Five out of six. He’s sticking around.**_ “If we get him on the right track, and he earns his magic back, who’s to say he won’t attempt to slaughter us?”

Even though Tony didn’t like the thought, he couldn’t help but agree. He turned to Thor, as did the others, waiting for an answer.

“Loki, would not slaughter you.” Thor said carefully. “He himself would not. Not in the right mind. But with the mind set you have shown me friends, tread carefully. I will speak with the director about his methods, for I did not realize how bad he was allowing Loki to be punished.”

“I thought you knew he was doing what he was.” Tony asked. “He was certain to say you approved.”

“I was told he was to be held at SHIELD for two weeks, and to be used if a situation of his expertise had arisen. You must understand friend Stark, that I had not known of their true intentions.”

“That’s the problem, you think it’s going to be okay, but when it comes to Loki, it _will not_. Not for a _very_ long and _torturous_ time. He’s pissed off so many of the _wrong_ and _powerful_ people to be in this situation.”

“And what may I do, to make him better, Man of Iron?” Thor’s voice was nearly shattered. Tony could see the guilt and sorrow filling his usual bright eyes. “I have done the best I could, but when it comes to my people, and my father, I could do no more.”

Tony gave a nod, watching the others stare intently at the table. They wanted to hear his answer.

If Tony had found himself in this situation just after the invasion, they would be in a different place. He knew that all of them, even Steve, would not have taken Loki in. They would have left him with SHIELD, allowing Loki to be tortured and most likely murdered.

But now, they were a team. A _good_ team at that. They wouldn’t allow it. Tony _himself_ wouldn’t allow it. Loki was a great sorcerer when he had his magic. But maybe together, they could make him _good_ man.

“If the situation arises and your father pushes torture, tell him that we, the human race look down upon that. He may not think we matter, but the _hell_ we do, and I _will_ tell him myself if I have to. Your father hasn’t grown since his rule. It is medieval and wrong to torture someone who isn’t in the right state of mind.” Tony leaned back quietly in his seat, folding his hands over his chest.

“Thank you, my friends. I will speak with the director and my father. I shall return within the week.” Thor gave a nod and flew off the landing pad.

“Why do I think we just signed our death warrant?” Tony spoke, head back as he stared at the ceiling.

“Because we did.” Bruce responded. Natasha and Clint were gone within moments after Thor’s leaving. Steve sat quietly, contemplating.

“I’m gonna see if I can get Bambi to eat.” Tony stood, leaving them to their thoughts. Why hadn’t having them agree made him feel any better?

~****~

Loki wanted to peel the bandage off his arm. He wanted to stare at the word marked forever in his skin, strip off the letters, and hang them for everyone to find. So they knew… So they _knew_ he was a monster. That fate would not allow anything else.

_I was born the villain of this story._

_I will always be the villain in they eyes of the Aesir, my father, my mother._

_I will always be hated by the race I so desperately tried to eradicate to just_ _**get home** _ _._

_I was born to create chaos, to destroy the worlds._

_Who would ever look at a weak, broken god, and think highly of him?_

“Loki?”

He snapped his head up, still hugging his knees and stared at the man.

“Shit, you, you look like someone who needs a shower.”

“I do not need your help, Stark.” Loki barely convinced himself. _Yes you do_. He shivered, hugging his knees tighter. _The burn. I still feel it, I need to feel it more…_

“See right there, you’re saying what you think we need to hear. And we don’t. We know you don’t _want_ our help. But you _need_ it. More than you know right now.”

“I do not understand this.” Loki growled, feeling the bed dip a fraction when he put his head against his knees. “I do not understand you mortals. Thinking you can make a difference, when certainly, I am considered a lost cause.”

“Maybe on that rock in the sky, but not here. I’ll tell you if you’re a lost cause Bambi.” Tony watched him, eyes falling on the blood stained bandage across his arm. “First things first, you reek. Of blood and sweat, and I’m pretty sure other stuff I know nothing of from the incident yesterday. Take a shower.” He lowered the arm Loki was staring at intently, forcing Loki’s eyes to meet his. “We’ll make a leather vambrace to cover that, alright.”

Tony stood, feeling Loki follow his every movement.

“For now there is clothing in the closet. Not a lot, we’ll take you out. Well one of us, and Pepper. She’s better at that stuff. Shower, and meet me in the common area when you are done. JARVIS will direct you if needed, right buddy?”

_Of course sir._

Loki flinched, crouching in an attacking position, eyes scanning for the invisible intruder.

“Who else is in here?” His eyes were blown wide, adrenaline pumping through his veins, and Tony realized, the two hadn’t been properly introduced.

“Oh, well. Uh, Loki, JARVIS runs the house. JARVIS, this is Loki, as you already know.” Tony smirked, rather happy with himself.

_I did not mean to frighten you, Mr. Laufeyson. I am Mr. Stark’s personal AI. I am run throughout the building and Mr. Stark’s suits. You can ask for any assistance from me, if needed. I will not speak unless there is a message for you as well._

“Good boy,”

_How leveling of you to consider me a pet, sir._

“I do not remember programming that much sass into an AI.” Tony muttered, Loki finally relaxing a bit. “But just call him if you need him. See you down in the common area.”

Loki watched the man walk out, a smile upon his face. He looked rather, pleased, with himself.

He sank back onto the bed, feet barely brushing the ground. This room he was in, was rather pleasant, compared to the bare room at SHEILD and the murky dungeons in Asgard.

The window had been repaired, allowing the city to shine bright during this time of day. (He could not tell, not right now. It was bright, yet dim, the lights turning on, indicating the dark rising.)

Loki did not like it. He did not like the feeling of seeing the city as beautiful. He had wanted to destroy this rock, and yet, seeing it this way made him feel so much worse. His eyes fell back to the bandage, blood from scratching at it spelling the word into the white cover.

_Monster._ _**MONSTER.** _

“Ghost, where is this, shower, Stark had spoken of?” His voice was quiet, and he _hated_ it. But there was no other option. He put the cuff on. He was now in the heed of the Avengers.

_The second door to the left, Mr. Laufeyson._

“Please do not call me by that name. I owe the title to no one. I am Loki, that is it. Not even that anymore,” He found himself muttering before he pushed the handle open into the room the ghost had mentioned.

_My pleasure Loki. Ask if you need help with any of the products._

Loki only nodded, suddenly feeling _dirty_ and _disgusting_ when he looked into the mirror. His hair was greasy, slicked back from it, and allowing him to look even more out of place. Various parts of his arms and neck were darker than the rest of his skin. He was _filthy_.

_You are scum, deserving to be a filth of the universe, Jotun._

He gripped the counter, knuckles turning white.

_I do not deserve this kindness. They will only turn on me in the end._

But for now, the former god knew he had to endure it. Because he made the choice.

For the first time in so many long years, after debating internally for days, Loki wanted to _try_.

**Author's Note:**

> So, um, this is my first attempt at frostiron. And this story is LONG from being done. But I wanted to get a feel from the fandom based on the first chapter (I'm about eleven chapters in right now).
> 
> This takes place after Iron Man 3, and Thor: The Dark World hasn't really happened.
> 
> So let me know what you guys think! I've been working on this for a while now.


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